Chicken Liver Pate

When I compiled my initial list of meats I used to love, this one popped into mind quite readily, which surprised me a little. It's an odd one, and not something I suspect many veggies would list as a favourite meat. Thinking about it, this has to be about school lunchboxes. Corned beef probably had to be to a large extent too, but I remember making corned beef hash at university. I can't remember the last time I had chicken liver pate, other than lunchboxes. (This also raised memories of small glass pots of fish and crab paste that I don't even know whether or not still exist. I'm definitely going to find out, because some of it's going on the list if it does.)

So there's a good chance we're going back 30 years for this one. My memory's not one of my strongest points, so this will be interesting to see if I've remembered this correctly.

I shopped around a bit, but couldn't find anything that leapt out at me in the local supermarkets, so ended up plumping for a tub of this chicken liver pate with brandy and cranberries from the folks who deliver my weekly veg box. I've just realised I should have tried one of the local delis, but I guess I've come to think of them as cheese shops over the years so it never occurred to me. I also could have tried a butcher's shop, but I think about shopping in the butchers about as often as I think about shopping in the hat shop (I own no hats).

Under the lid, it's a little browner than I remember pate being, but then since I'm remembering lunch-box fillings that's perhaps not surprising. Thinking about it, the pate I've seen in delis has often been very-nearly grey in colour, so this is looking pretty good in comparison.

Preparation-wise this one's going to be nice and simple again - it's getting whacked on top of a slice buttered wholemeal toast - like so:

First bite, then - scoff!

Oh my! That's really good. Really really good. I'm tempted to make the rest of the post the word "Nom!" in the largest font I can find, but that would be a bit of a cop out. But then I'm struggling to find the words to describe this, and in particular why I like it quite so much.

Let's have another bite. Yep! That's bloody lovely. It's rich and smooth and really tasty, and yet somehow understated too. Still struggling to properly describe this though.

So, I polish the lot off - and I'm still struggling. The best I can come up with is that it seems like a meat equivalent of a really good cheese in a way. It's got a richness that's filling my gob in the same way a cheddar would, but instead of the dairy creaminess it has a meaty equivalent. I've watched enough Masterchef to know that Greg Wallace would call it iron-richness, so I'll run with that. Regardless, it's complex and interesting, and basically right up my street. So I pop back to the fridge for another crack at it.

In conclusion, I'm clearly not very good at describing it, but I sure as hell like it a lot. This is going straight to number one in the league, which I'd never have guessed beforehand. What's more my brain is getting a gold star for remembering it. So far, other than with scallops (where I'd like to try them cooked by a pro) I've not considered having another go at the other things I've tried after eating it for this blog. I'm finding this stuff nice enough that I may well revisit it later, or perhaps have a try of some different varieties. If I do decide to return to being a veggie this is one thing I will genuinely miss.

Reformed Herring Product

So it seems there's a category of meat I'd missed - the stuff I've never heard of before. I'd decided to have a pop at chicken or duck liver pate. (I can't remember the last time I ate it, but when I think about meat I used to like chicken liver pate pops into my head. I've only got a vague recollection of what it tastes like, so it's strange that it springs so readily to mind.) Anyway, I was in a Tesco Metro, and I didn't fancy the pate they had on offer, so was heading out of the meat, cheese and fish aisle with an empty basket, when some feckless dithering lump blocked my way as they struggled to think and walk at the same time. Forced to wait, I glanced at the shelf of fishy products nearest and spotted what looked like a jar of caviar. In a Tesco Metro? Caviar is (unsurprisingly) on my list of meats I haven't tried (or at least non-veggie products), so I took a closer look. Of course it wasn't caviar - it was the delightfully-named Onuga brand Reformed Herring Product. Seriously, look at the picture - Reformed Herring Product! It sounds like it was named by Google Translate on something originally written in Ukrainian.

With a name that appetising my hand was forced (despite a 50g jar costing nigh-on four quid).

From the label it's clear this is meant to be a cheap caviar replacement, but since I've never had caviar before this is going to be judged solely by how good it is as Reformed Herring Product. It's made from smoked herring, seaweed, salt, a thickener made from seaweed, honey, lemon juice and herring extract all coloured with vegetable carbon. Mmm! Herring extract and vegetable carbon - together at last!


Serving
With no blinis to hand, this is getting slapped on a piece of buttered wholemeal toast. I'll cut the crusts off to keep things a little refined though. It looks the part, I guess.

First bite - scoff! Salty. That's all I get at first, salty and slightly sharp. And then the fishiness comes through. Ew! Not too sure about that. It's not overly strong, but it's definitely there, and I haven't tasted anything even remotely close to it in twenty years. For many meats there are obviously veggie alternatives that at least have a stab at getting the taste close to the real thing. As far as I'm aware there's no veggie herring.

Let's have another go. Yeah - that's not getting any more pleasant. The saltiness is fine, and there's a taste of the sea briefly before the full fishiness turns up and that bit I'm really not a fan of. The texture is strange too. It's made of little balls of jelly, but they're quite firm and slippery, and don't easily pop or yield when bitten into - and instead tend to squirm away from your teeth.

I stick with it and finish it off. I like it a little less with each bite. That fishiness is just so alien to me now. This is a worry since two of the things on my meagre list of meat I used to love are fish (fish and chips, and peppered mackerel), as are loads of the items on the list of meats I've never tried. The fishiness of the Reformed Herring Product reminds me of the peppered mackerel I used to really enjoy, but if that memory is accurate then clearly my taste has changed quite a lot. I'm not looking forward to the peppered mackerel at all now.

With most of the pot left I'll perhaps have another go at this tomorrow, but I'm not holding out much hope. Bottom of the league for this, I reckon.